I’m An Idiot!

May 11th, 2010


Mark Catsburg Blog…Before you get your hopes up, this isn’t going to be a big rant on tight pants verse big pants, or fashion over function (I mean, pretty obvious who wins on this occasion right?) or any other over saturated argument about who wears what and how lame one person is over another. I’m done with that, and if you aren’t by now you really need to have a look around and seriously reconsider your opinions. It’s 2010, enough said?

No, this is just a story about how I am an idiot. (Also a pretty good chance to share some hilarious photos.)

 

These photos were taken on an impromptu family snowboard trip to Canada. I say impromptu, as if I got a call out of the blue, and left the next day, but that really wasn’t the case. My family is spread out around the globe and my Mum gets us together every couple of years so she can make sure we are all doing ok. So I did know it was coming, it’s just I sort of didn’t bother thinking that much about it. So when the time came to leave, I wasn’t particularly prepared, I managed to scrape up a board, boots and bindings from around the place, dug around in the closet for some goggles and gloves, threw the warmest clothes I had into a beat up leather duffel bag, and got on the plane. (After several years of living out of a board bag, I have an avid aversion to the things. I hate them! I got an astute pleasure watching Nick Gregory chuck a couple off the roof.

 

 

So I was limited to the amount of luggage I could take, but I mean, lets be honest, I thought I would be fine, I have been living in Australia for a few years now, so I think there was definitely hints of a “she’ll-be-right-mate” attitude peeking through – I was wrong!

I got away with outfits like these for years in Salt Lake and New Zealand, so wasn’t particularly uncomfortable wearing jeans and a coat and a bunch of whatever else I could pile on, plus my bank account wasn’t too interested in letting go of a couple hundred dollars for an outfit made of materials I know nothing about, or a jacket coloured like a bowl of fruit salad, powder skirt? (I may wear tight pants but I don’t wear skirts) I’ll tuck in thanks… So I made do.

But…

Canada is fucking cold! Duh. Hence the title of this blog post. The first couple of days were ok, light dustings of snow here and there made for super fun little tree runs, park laps & jibs here and there. Aside from the worried looks on my mothers face and her relentlessly offering to buy me way overpriced outerwear everything was fine. I figured I would get away with it as long as I just didn’t fall… again, idiot.

 

It dumped hard, for days. It’s Canada. I considered staying in to watch the hills instead of getting hypothermia, but then I thought again. It’s dumping, I’m in Canada, everyone else is going to have the best day ever. I’ll make do. Off I went.

The state of this outfit wasn’t as bad as it looked all day, I was wet but not that cold. I had a frozen beard and my scarf had gone all stiff, but I was getting turns brah – slashing pow man – white room all day homie! That kind of thing. Until I got stung by the scorpion SO HARD! It came out of nowhere. I don’t think I had experienced a scorpion that hard since I was learning to turn. It was honestly picture perfect, if scorpions were a sport and there were a panel of judges I would have scored very highly. Picture it, I was going so fast, laughing about some slash I had just made, looking back to watch whoever behind me was doing the same, turn around, unexpected bump, 90-degree toe edge, and WHACK. The Board hit me in the back of the head as I slid on my face, wind knocked out of me – the entire package. God I wish I could have seen it myself from a distance, it was gold, I got owned and covered entirely in snow.

And that’s it… these photos were from the aftermath. I paid the piper. Then, when my brother mentioned that the next destination was Revelstoke, the highest elevation in the Northern Hemisphere and we were still going to be in Canada for another two weeks, I paid the guy at the snowboard shop for some pants.

 

More Mark Catsburg Blogs:

10 Predictions for 2010

The Best Snowboard Movies For 2010

I Quit Snowboarding