Learning to Snowboard with Joe on New Year’s Day
Practically a pro
Blog | Tessa Cook
It’s the first day of 2012. Turn of the year celebrations have taken their toll on the residents of Mammoth Lakes in general and myself in particular. I’ve stomached nothing but dry cornflakes, the ground shifts slightly when I turn my head suddenly and I can feel the shakes coming on.
So why not give snowboarding a try.
Mammoth, like the rest of the USA, is having a Slllooooowwww start to season 2011/12. So though this New Year self-flagellation is really me trying new skill to make the most of things when there’s not much snow.
My guide into the world of sideways sliding – Joe Gilman. Joe’s remarkably chipper for new year’s day, the consummate professional. I tell him I’m both uncoordinated and fearful, and having broken several bones doing things people told me to ‘just try, what’s the worst that can happen’, the fear is potent. Joe promises no disaster will befall me. I’m skeptical.
On two planks I’m comfortable, things feel good, strapped to just one the game changes – surely it’s unnatural to bind a person’s two legs together like this, were people really made to go sideways? Ground that on skis is just ‘flat’ suddenly develops a sinister topography of bumps, dips and slopes and Joe is expecting me to slide around on it.
Getting all the instruction
I take my first slide. I don’t die. I take my second. Still no death. My first attempts at stopping, one foot strapped in, aren’t great but apparently I’m ready for the magic carpet.
Apart from the getting-up business – someone should invent the snowboard with the clip-on booster pole – having two feet strapped in is actually far more comfortable and gliding side to side across the hill – falling leaf is the technical term – is kind of fun. I’m forgetting the certain feeling of impeding doom and starting to enjoy myself – thanks to Joe, who’s simple ‘point your but where you want to go’ instruction makes perfect sense and who hasn’t yet forced me to stand up without a helping hand.
So to the chairlift.
In the ski world, a first timer wouldn’t be let anywhere near a chairlift until their left hand turn could match up with their right hand turn, and back again. Nor would they want to be – death-plow straightlining, even on a baby-slope gradient, leads to hideous inner-thigh cramps. In snowboarding, comfortably being able to glide from side to side will get you down the hill – so the first-timer’s lesson progression is all the more satisfying.
That being said, getting of a chairlift sideways seems much more daunting than doing it facing forwards. But Joe has the liftie slow the chair down and, thanks to those one-foot-strapped-in glides he had me practice I survive, upright.
Mammoth – in a stroke of genius – has placed benches at the top of the lift for those, like me, for whom standing-up from flat ground on an unpredictably slippery snowboard is just not fun.
And I’m off. Having decided sitting down leads to too many standing back up problems I’m resolved to do the whole run without stopping. Left, to right and back again I ‘point my bum’ where I want to go and try to remember to keep my knees bent. Who knows what I look like with my arms out ‘demo-arm’ style but I’m well satisfied with how feel – any sense of impending doom is completely forgotten, this snowboarding caper is pretty alright.
The best instructor
10 things to do on your snow trip when the snow’s taken a trip
1. Switch it up. If it’s not skiing to snowboarding, or vice versa, how about telemarking, cross country skiing, mono-boarding… Terrain you scoff at on your natural boards will seem challenging.
2. Get into the Park. Resorts are good at ensuring the parks are put together when there’s little snow. If you’re under-confident, get a lesson – it’s amazing what some proper progression teaching will do to your skills.
3. Ski-biking. If you haven’t seen these things, picture a tricycle with sleds instead of wheels. Most resorts allow them and while they’re pretty crazy – note, no breaks – they’re pretty fun too.
3. Snowshoeing/hiking. It might seem dismal if you don’t even need snowshoes to get there but taking a walk upwards makes the most of being in the mountains.
4. Has to be said – get into the local pub scene. If the conditions aren’t tempting you to ride, there will be plenty of others in the same boat. Remember, it’s a holiday, meeting new friends at the bar and enjoying a few seep-in mornings is a great way to relax.
5. Bike riding. If the snow cover’s really low, bike paths may still be open. You’re outdoors, exercising and seeing the local scenery.
6. Check out local activities. Resorts are pretty good at offering entertainments. You might find anything from ice skating to sushi-making classes.
7. Track down the hardest puzzle the local area can supply and let its hundreds of same-coloured pieces frustrate you for weeks.
8. Support the local community; shop. If you’re worried about luggage limits, don’t be – post the excess home. So it takes two months by ship, if it’s next year’s Christmas presents it doesn’t matter.
9. Spa. Again, you’re on holiday, if massages, facials and mani-pedis make you feel good, do it, boys too.
10. Last of all – pack up and move on to where the snow is falling. Sure you’ll spend some extra money but you made all the effort to get where you are now, what’s a little more to actually have some good riding.
